why is my world always revolving around these words.. and they seem to get worser and more hurtful each time.. we wouldn't like this before, wouldn't we? remember those happy times we had when we sit around and laugh at one another's silly experiences? i reminisce them.. but look at now.. you think that i've changed, i haven't! i'm still that girl whom you saw 16 years ago! i love you, you know! i love you! i know sometimes you have to say all these for my sake but not everyday right? you're dumb, useless, hopeless... i'm still a human with feelings after all. i don't see you treating the maid like that.. so am i more worthless than a maid? i don't see you praising me after i do something for you.. nevermind.. but when i just forget to keep my things, you gave me all those words! i tried my best to please you already.. what else do you want? tell me, i can change. why do you always have to see my negative sides? are you that proud of them? i'm your close one, my dear! i need encouragement, not discouragement! Os are coming, yet, all these crap are increasing as well.. i often cry myself to sleep you know? everything seems so stressful for me! can i go up to heaven right now, so that all these crap can stop!?!?!? i don't wish to see us like that.. it's so hurting. i'll be praying but i hope that you will do your part? but do remember.. I love you, Mum!